Susan Dies: 0:38

Welcome to the One Yes at A Time podcast. My name is Susan Dies, and I'm here with my co-host, Kera Hobley, and today we are talking about no one's favorite subject. Mm. Today's topic is Say Yes to Humility.

Keidra Hobley: 0:49

Yes.

Susan Dies: 0:50

Keidra, when you hear the word humility, what is the first thing that comes into your mind?

Keidra Hobley: 0:54

I actually studied humility years ago, and the thing that I learned then was I believe it comes from the root word humilis. And that root word means dirt. I know. That got me. And so it really struck me. To be humble means to remember that we were created from dirt.

Susan Dies: 1:13

Oh, wow.

Keidra Hobley: 1:14

And if we keep that perspective... it makes it much easier to remain humble.

Susan Dies: 1:20

I have never heard of that. Mm-hmm. I did look up the word humility.. Okay... in the Miriam Webster dictionary, and it said not haughty or proud. Yeah. Freedom from Pride... and I thought it was interesting that they defined it by what it's not.. Uhhuh... rather than by what it is. And I think maybe that's because we all know what pride is. Mm-hmm. Pride is the opposite of humility. It's a very recognizable trait. Prideful people are always self-focused, and when you're trying to have a conversation with someone who's prideful, it seems that no matter what you're talking about, what direction the conversation is going, somehow they're always able to turn the conversation and the attention to right back to them. Yeah. And the reason I said that humility is no one's favorite subject is because I recently read several articles that cited these studies that were done back in 2012 by some Harvard University professors, and this was published in the proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. And researchers used functional MRI scans to determine what happens in the human brain when people talk about themselves. What they found is that the areas in the brain that are associated with pleasure and reward increased significantly in activity in that area of the brain when people talked about themselves. The study showed that the same areas of our brain that are triggered by the pleasure we get from sex, or money.. Mm-hmm... or drugs... or even the pleasure of laughter that we have with people we love is the same areas of our brain that are triggered when we talk about ourselves. Wow. Proving... that we are our own favorite subject.

Keidra Hobley: 2:54

Oh my goodness.

Susan Dies: 2:55

What do you think about that?

Keidra Hobley: 2:56

That blows my mind, you know? Especially as someone who does not like to talk about herself. Mm-hmm. I need to get that scan of my brain, see what happens.

Susan Dies: 3:04

Maybe you're truly humble.

Keidra Hobley: 3:05

Well, praise the Lord.

Susan Dies: 3:05

But basically we get a dopamine hit.. Mm-hmm... every time we talk about ourselves, which kind of explains why people love social media platforms so much. Mm-hmm. Why social media is so addictive. Dopamine, which we know is that feel good neurotransmitter in the brain is released every time we experience something that gives us pleasure. And we get that every time we post something on social media... and someone likes it... or someone makes a positive comment about that thing that we've posted. Mm-hmm. And I know you're not on social media, right? No. No, I'm not. And i'm only on it intermittently. But this is a real phenomenon. It's also why people can get their feelings hurt, or they can get upset, if they post something and others don't like it, or they don't make a comment on a picture or a post, because so many people are looking to their social media accounts, these days, for affirmation and even for pleasure. This is the world that we live in. Mm-hmm. And so the digital age has allowed us to make it all about us, which is not only unhealthy, but it can also be dangerous, and it is the exact opposite of what God wants the focus of our life to be. And so I want you to just talk a little bit about your thoughts on that, and maybe even why you decided not to be on social media.

Keidra Hobley: 4:19

Oh, well that's, that's a whole podcast in itself. Oh goodness. But I, I mean, I literally don't like to talk about myself. I really don't like to take pictures. And so that seemed to be all it was initially... the selfies. I, I'm, I'm not a selfie girl. Mm-hmm. And so I don't want it to be about me. And so that's what social media looks like to me. Mm-hmm. And so I didn't want any parts of that. Not to mention the fact that I, I don't need one more thing to manage.

Susan Dies: 4:43

Okay. Okay. That's fair. To me... social media is really kind of this two-edged sword. It can be used for great good. Mm-hmm. Or it can be used for great harm. And I think the more people use it, and the more that we're on it, in any given day, the more opportunity there is for us to be exposed to the best in people and the worst in people. Some people that we've never even met.. Yeah... yet who can have such a profound effect on our lives. But I wanna share a few more things from this study that I thought were kind of actually funny that really ties into our topic of humility for today's podcast. At one point in the study, researchers offered these participants 4 cents for every question they answered about other people, and only 2 cents for every question they answered about themselves. Which questions do you think they chose to answer?

Keidra Hobley: 5:34

The 2 cent questions.

Susan Dies: 5:36

They did Exactly. They chose to answer the 2 cent questions so that they could keep talking.. Oh, wow... about themselves. And those doing the research believe that that's because the activity or the stimulation of those reward areas in the brain weren't quite as strong when they were talking about others as it is when we're talking about ourselves. And so because we are pleasure driven, we innately do the thing that brings us the most pleasure which is one of the reasons that humility is just so difficult for so many people. Another interesting thing about that research is they found that about 40% of our daily face-to-face conversations with other people is about ourselves. Wow. Our experiences, our beliefs, our opinions, our wants, our needs, our desires. But when it comes to our interactions on social media, 80%.. Oh my goodness... of what people talk about and post about is themselves.

Keidra Hobley: 6:31

You know what's interesting about that statistic.. Mm-hmm... is that I don't think we're having as many face-to-face conversations as we used to. That's right. There's so much more social media interaction.. Right... than there is face to face.

Susan Dies: 6:40

Well, and what's interesting too is, on social media you have this false sense that you know the other person. You feel like you're connected, and yet you've never even met that person. Right. Honestly, if I look at my own Facebook page, the majority of what I post is about the people, and the places, and the things that bring me pleasure. And when people like it... or they comment on it in a positive way... I do enjoy it. That is the point of social media. But it's also why I limit my time on social media, because we do live in a very me centered world. Yeah. And as someone who wants to live my life in a way that honors God, I don't want my world to be all about me. I want my life to be all about God. I want it to be about others... and I know that's what his word commands us to do... to lift up the name of Jesus and to love others by lifting them up. And I can't do that if I make it all about me. In fact, Philippians 2:3-4 says,"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility, value others above yourselves. Let each of you look not only to your own interest, but also to the interest of others." And I think this verse, gives us the best and probably the clearest definition of what biblical humility is supposed to look like.. Mm-hmm... in practice. Humble people care about other people. Yeah. Humble people value other people above themselves, and anything that we think, do, or say that elevates others more than we're elevating ourselves... especially when we're doing it in obedience to God... which is what we talked about in our last podcast.. Mm-hmm... is an act of humility that honors God, and that honors other people.

Keidra Hobley: 8:18

Yeah.

Susan Dies: 8:18

So what are some other verses, that could give us a better understanding of what humility might look like?

Keidra Hobley: 8:24

Well, there's a ton of them and so, I'll just mention a few, but Philippians 2:5-11, it says,"In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus who being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage. Rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness, and being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross. Mm. Therefore, God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name. At that name of Jesus, every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledged that Jesus Christ is Lord to the glory of God the Father. That's just one of many. You want me to share a couple more?

Susan Dies: 9:20

I want you to share a few more.

Keidra Hobley: 9:21

Well, one of my absolutely favorite verses, it's actually my life verse Ephesians 4:1-2."As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received." We can't walk in the calling we've received. If we don't walk humbly. That's right. So that's verse one. Verse two says,"Be completely humble and gentle. Be patient bearing one another in love."

Susan Dies: 9:43

I love that. So out of all the verses in scripture, all the verses in the whole Bible..

Keidra Hobley: 9:49

Ephesians 4:1 is the one I choose.

Susan Dies: 9:51

And it's because it reminds you that you wanna walk in a manner that is worthy of your calling in Christ. Yes. I love that.

Keidra Hobley: 9:58

It keeps it before me. Yeah, it's a constant reminder. Keidra, is what you're choosing to wear in alignment with your calling? Mm-hmm. Is where you're choosing to go in alignment with your calling? Is what it's about to come outta your mouth in alignment with your calling? So that's why that one strikes me so much. That's a constant reminder. I see that. Yeah. That's a great life first. Yeah. I'm glad you shared that. And then Romans 12:16 says,"Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. It's interesting to me how many times the Bible tells us, don't be conceited." Mm. Colossians 3:12,"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourself with compassion kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience."

Susan Dies: 10:44

So people who are humble are also gentle, and patient, and loving.. Mm-hmm... even when someone's being difficult. Yeah. When you mentioned Romans 12:16.. In this verse, we see that humble people wanna live in harmony with other people. They do what they can to bring peace and harmony to relationships and situations rather than add to the chaos or to the drama. And I love that because I don't do drama. You don't do drama. I don't do drama. Colossians 3:12.. This is one of my favorite verses because I like this word picture."Clothe yourselves.. Mm-hmm... just like the choice we make every single day regarding what clothes we're gonna put on, humility is a character trait, just like compassion, and kindness, and gentleness, and patience, that we can choose to put on every single day as well. And so I love that in this verse, humility is sandwiched between these other wonderful traits. Yeah. And then.. Yeah. I was thinking about 1 Peter 3:8. It says,"Finally, all of you be like-minded. Mm-hmm. Be sympathetic. Love one another. Be compassionate and humble." And I like this phrase like-minded because I think truly humble people want to hear the thoughts and the opinions, and ideas and beliefs of others. And if possible, find some common ground.. Yes... to be like-minded. And even if they can't, to at least be loving, and compassionate as they listen and respectfully disagree. So these are all great verses that really kind of help us see the kinds of character traits that people who walk in humility possess... how they act, and react, and respond in relationships with others. But our ultimate example of humility is, as you said, those verses that you read in Philippians about Jesus. Mm-hmm. And I can't help thinking, every time I read those verses, that even though Jesus was God's son.. Yeah... like God in the flesh... he humbled himself under his father's authority. The Bible is telling us that the cross was the Father's plan. Mm-hmm. And that Jesus agreed to this plan... and he willingly emptied himself... coming to earth in the same way that the rest of us do... as a helpless baby.. Yeah... even though he was God. I mean, talk about humble yourself. And he lived in relative poverty. Mm-hmm. And so he didn't come as the king that he was. And then he willingly gave his life on the cross for anyone willing to believe, even his enemies. Not just those who willingly followed him. and it says the result of his willingness to humble himself in this way was that God the Father exalted him. Yeah. God raised him from the dead, gave him the name above all names. Mm-hmm. And one day whether people want to or not, whether they believe they're gonna do it or not, scripture tells us that every knee will bow.. Yes... and every tongue we'll confess that Jesus Christ is Lord.. Yeah... to the glory of God the Father. And to me, what's so incredible about all of this, as if there's anything more incredible than that, is that when we.. Mm-hmm... willingly humble ourselves, and when we as believers walk in humility as God's word commands us to do, God exalts us. Yes. I wanna read some verses for our listeners so that they can know i'm not making this up. Psalm 149:4 says,"For the Lord takes delight in his people. He crowns the humble with victory." That's so good. Matthew 23:12."But whoever has exalted himself shall be humbled and whoever has humbled himself shall be exalted." That's good. James 4:10."Humble yourselves before the Lord and he will lift you up." Amen. 1 Peter 5:6."Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand that he may lift you up in due time." So God exalts, he takes delight in us. He gives victory to us. And he lifts up those who are willing to humble themselves. But God's word also tells us in Daniel 4:37, that for those who are unwilling to humble themselves, that God knows how to humble those who walk in pride. Yes, he does. Yeah. James 4:6 says,"God resists the proud, but he gives grace to the humble." Why do you think God resists the proud so much? Mm-hmm. Because it's the characteristic that got Satan kicked out of heaven. That's right. Yeah. I think, I think one of the things that we don't realize is that, he's able to humble. That's humility. Like humility is perfected through humiliation. Hmm. To, yeah, I think I said that right. You have to think about that. Yeah, I did too. I did too. But that's what I do. I thought about that earlier. I like, I think it is.. So we have to go through a season of humiliation to actually be able to walk in humility. Is that what you're saying? Yes, And we don't really know the strength and grace of God if we never experience weakness and humiliation. Hmm. And so it's, it, it kinda gives you a different perspective of it when you look at it that way. Right. I think it's also because we are never more like Satan than when we walk in pride.. Mm-hmm... because that is where sin originated. Mm-hmm. You know, before man sinned Satan had already allowed that sin of pride to cause him to rebel against God... and to incite one third of the other angels to rebel against God.. Yeah. And we know that God cast them out of heaven. They had no fear of God. Mm-hmm. And so when Satan tempted Adam and Eve to sin, his ploy was to make them think that they had nothing to fear by disobeying God, even though he knew better than anyone else that sin had its consequences. Yeah. And so unfortunately, in our pridefulness. we set ourselves up for some really hard lessons in humility. There's this verse in Psalms 55:19 that says,"He who is before time... talking about God.. Mm-hmm... will humble them, for there is no change with them and they have not feared." So this is the reason why prideful people have no fear of God because they are in essence, their own God. Yeah. Right?

Keidra Hobley: 16:17

Yeah.

Susan Dies: 16:18

They think that they know best. And so it's very hard for them to change even when they're confronted with the truth of God's word. And so sometimes in God's love, he steps in, and he will humble us for our own good if we're unwilling. And I can tell you from my own experiences that it is so much better to be humbled by God, even though it's usually, a painful lesson, than it is to walk in pride... because the Bible tells us clearly that pride comes before a fall. That's right. And so I've been there and it is so much easier just to hear God's word... humble ourselves... than it is to ignore his word and to have to learn those lessons of humility the hard way. But what I love so much about God is that when he does humble us... it's not to break us. Mm-hmm. It's always to teach us that his way is better. And we see that in Psalm 119:71, where it says,"It is good for me that you humbled me so that I may learn your ways." Yeah. There's another verse. I'm not sure what the book chapter and verse is, but it says,"Before I was afflicted, I went astray. Yeah. But now I keep your word." God wants us to experience all that he has for us, but we have to start with a heart of humility. 2 Chronicles 7: 14 is a verse that all of us are familiar with."If my people.. Mm-hmm... who are called by my name.. Yeah... will humble themselves and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and I will forgive their sin, and I will heal their land." Yeah. I mean, that's a mouthful of promises. Yeah. but it begins with a heart. of humility. So what are some other thoughts that you have about this topic.. Yeah... of humility?

Keidra Hobley: 17:55

I think just the podcast itself. One Yes At A Time. It's all about surrender. Mm-hmm. And I believe that full surrender is the greatest form of true humility. Mm-hmm. And so a, a part of that is dying to self. So I kind of wanna just take a minute to focus on dying to self, because humility is not just about the absence of exalting yourself, it's also the presence of denying yourself. Hmm. That's something that I, I thought was very interesting. The presence of God is greatest when the absence of self is greatest. Right. Right. And so sometimes we don't realize it, but you mentioned the social media, the dopamine hits. Mm-hmm. That's us being full of ourselves and until we become nothing, God can't become all. Think about it. You can't have a glass full of water and full of soda at the same time. Right? You have to empty one out in order for it to be full of the other. And we have to empty ourselves of ourselves so that we can be full of him. You can't be full of God and full of yourself at the same time. And so some of us don't need to be delivered from a demon... come on and when need to delivered from ourselves of some of us need to be delivered from ourselves. And so we have to be mindful of that. The more I empty myself, the more of God I can be filled with. And so we, have to realize that we lose absolutely nothing by choosing to give our entire life to God. Humility.. Mm-hmm... is all that's left when we're fully surrendered.

Susan Dies: 19:14

Right. That's so good. Mm-hmm. All of that is so good. I'm gonna circle back around real quick to the verse in 2 Chronicles 7:14. Okay. Just thinking about, you know, where we are as a country right now. There's no doubt that our country and our world is in a mess... that we're spinning outta control so fast. And it's so easy for us to feel helpless and hopeless because we know, that without God's intervention, we are gonna self-destruct because of our pride. Mm-hmm. But in this verse, God is telling believers there is something that we can do. Yeah. We're not helpless. And we're not hopeless... because if God's people, Christians around the world.. Yeah... will humble ourselves, and pray, and seek his face, and turn from our wicked ways.. He's talking to believers. Yes. He's not talking to non-believers who don't even know what his commands are. This is to believers. It says,"Then.. Mm-hmm.. He will hear from heaven. He will forgive our sin, he will heal our land. And our land, America, was founded on Christian principles. I don't care what anyone says, what arguments anyone wants to bring. That is a fact, and only those who have no fear of God, no desire to honor God, no desire to obey God would say otherwise. Our entire legal system is based on God's commands. Mm-hmm. Our calendar is based on the birth of Jesus. His fingerprints, God's fingerprints, are all over our constitution and our laws, and he gave us this land so that we might be a blessing to the world, a beacon of hope as a Christian nation. So I just like to encourage and challenge our listeners to be willing to humble themselves.. Yeah... as God has asked us to do... trusting that he will then do as he's promised. I think it's time for us as believers, to humble ourselves for the glory of God and for the people that we love and for this land that we cherish, and I think Micah 6:8 tells us pretty clearly exactly what God expects of believers. It says,"God has shown you what is good. Mm-hmm. We know... and what does the Lord require of you?" Yeah. Just in case you're still unsure. Mm-hmm."To act justly, to love mercy.. Mm-hmm... and to walk humbly with your God." Mm-hmm. What are your last thoughts? Last thing You wanna leave with listeners today about this topic

Keidra Hobley: 21:28

I, I want to encourage you to be completely dependent on God. That's what humility is all about. It's a complete, total dependence on God, full surrender, honoring people, serving with joy, not being jealous, quick to forgive. Mm-hmm. That is characteristic of a truly humble person.

Susan Dies: 21:48

That's right. And you know what? We cannot do it without Jesus. Mm-hmm. We need his spirit of humility living in us.. Yes... to be able to do the things that we've talked about today, and especially the last things that you've mentioned. Amen. Alright! Well I'm gonna have you pray us out in just a minute, but first, we hope you've enjoyed today's podcast and that you've been encouraged. Hopefully you've been challenged, knowing that when we do what God has asked us to do his blessings are always on the other side of our yes. And one thing I wanna let you know as we close out today's podcast is that today's episode is the 10th episode and the end of season one. And so we're gonna take a break in the month of October to plan out season two, and that first episode will be available on your favorite platform November 6th. So be sure to join us. It'll be a great season of growth in your life as together we continue putting God's word into practice... one yes at a time. Keidra, would you pray us out today?

Keidra Hobley: 22:43

Absolutely. Father, we thank you so much for this day. We thank you for this time in your presence. Help us, dear Lord, to do what it is you instruct us to do and to walk humbly before you. Help us to love people like you love people. Jesus, if you were the holiest person who ever walked this earth and was also the humblest person whoever walked this earth, then surely we could seek to do the same. So help us to be more like you. Yes, we thank you for it. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Amen.