Susan Dies: 0:38

Welcome to another episode of The One Yes At A Time podcast. I'm Keidra, here with my friend, Susan. Mm-hmm. And we are so excited about this particular podcast. Yes. And so I wanna start this one out by asking you a question, Susan. Okay.

Keidra Hobley: 0:52

Have you ever watched the a hundred thousand dollars Pyramid game show?

Susan Dies: 0:56

Yes. Okay. Okay. It's been a long time.

Keidra Hobley: 0:58

You understand the concept. So I'm gonna give you some clues and you try to guess what the theme of the clues are. Okay? Mm-hmm. Here we go. Slow traffic. Slow internet connection. Standing..

Susan Dies: 1:10

Frustrating.

Keidra Hobley: 1:11

Yes. Very frustrating. Standing in a checkout line.

Susan Dies: 1:15

Things that make us wait.

Keidra Hobley: 1:16

Mm-hmm. Sitting in a doctor's office.

Susan Dies: 1:20

You might have to tell me the answer.

Keidra Hobley: 1:21

Things that test our patients. Okay. Okay. Yeah. And they probably test our patience because they make us wait. Yes. So that's really good. That's really good. And so that's what we're gonna be focusing our time together on today. We're gonna be talking about the fruit of the Spirit that we refer to as patience. Okay. Okay. And so how would you evaluate yourself on a scale of one to 10? How patient would you say you are?

Susan Dies: 1:43

Well, I would love to say seven, eight or nine. Uhhuh... but it's probably more like a five or a six. Okay. And I say that because I think like most people, I'm very patient with some things. Yes, I'm impatient with other things. And so I feel like those two kind of counter each other. When I think about impatience.. Yeah... everybody who knows me well knows that technology when it doesn't work is the thing that can frustrate me more than anything else and make me wanna pull my hair out and throw it out the window. In fact, a couple of weeks ago I was with my son and my daughter-in-law who had a, new baby. Yay... JD. He's so beautiful. I had The privilege to take photos of their family before they came home from the hospital and to take newborn photos after he came home. And I wanted to use natural light for all these pictures, and so I brought all my good camera equipment, but instead of a lighting set up, I brought a reflector. Do you know what I'm talking about? I do. Okay. And so when the reflector is in its case, it's this small circle, maybe about 18 inches wide. Mm-hmm. But when I take it out of the case, it unfolds to four foot by six foot. It is a massive reflector to help me get a lot of light and to reflect that natural light so I could take these pictures without a flash.

Keidra Hobley: 2:58

Wait, wait, wait. Did you have that in the hospital room? No. Oh, okay.

Susan Dies: 3:01

No. But in a hospital room there's always that big window. Window. Mm-hmm. I see. And so I was still able to use that natural light. But when we were at home.. Uhhuh... we had to wait on naps and, for Kelley to feed the baby, and then to get dressed and ready, Annie to get ready, all these different things... and so we were losing light... so I was really glad that I had this big reflector. But after I used the reflector, took all the pictures I was gonna take, I began to try to fold this reflector back down to this 18 inch circle. Mm-hmm. I was literally wrestling with this reflector. I think Kelly even videoed me. Kelly's mom was there. Katie was wrestling it with me. I was laughing so hard. At one point I thought, I'm gonna wet my pants. I mean, this is so ridiculous. I even had Mitchell, Kelly's brother.. Mm-hmm... try to, get it back down in this small circle. And I watched at least 25 videos. They watched the videos too. Jonathan tried. Everybody tried, and finally I just lost my patience and I threw it outside on their deck and I thought, I'm just gonna throw it away. Oh. But then, the next day I woke up and I thought, you know, maybe I'll try it one last time. So I go out the side door to the deck and it has all these, big muddy footprints on it.. Wow... because nobody really knew why it was out there. They just assumed it was a piece, piece of trash. And so at that point it did become a piece of trash and I just took it over to the big trash bins outside and I put it up there for Jonathan to take to the dump. And so I'm gonna be having to buy a new reflector because of my impatience. But I really think, after watching 25 videos... and everybody else seeing the same thing I'm seeing.. Mm-hmm... and still not being able to do it... it had to be the reflector. Okay. Something. had to be wrong Mm-hmm. We just could not get it. But anyway, what about you? Make me feel better! Can you think of a time, or maybe share a time when you lost your patience or you were tempted to lose your patience? What did that look like? How did you handle it? Mm-hmm. And how patient are you on a scale of one to 10?

Keidra Hobley: 5:00

Oh my goodness. Well, I would probably say, again, like you said, it depends on the scenario. But overall. probably a six. Okay. I would probably say a six. And I actually did a survey of my family.. Uh huh.. in preparation for this... just to see, I probably shouldn't have said it was my family. But it's who it was. I took a survey.

Susan Dies: 5:17

Well, maybe this apple doesn't fall far from the tree. We'll see.

Keidra Hobley: 5:20

Well, no, because, it was not just my immediate. It was my, extended family. But on average it was a 5.5. And we're believers. Okay. Well, I said said five to six, so, you know, we're in the same boat. That's very, that's very interesting to me. Mm-hmm. Yeah. And you mentioned technology. I think about technology and I think technology in today's society has made us more impatient than, than ever before. I think so. Because think about it. When you look up something on the internet.. Mm-hmm... if it doesn't pop up immediately, how many times do we hit that refresh button on our browser? Like, what is happening? You know, it's like immediately.

Susan Dies: 5:52

Or I usually ask David, is the internet slow tonight for some reason? Yes. Yes.

Keidra Hobley: 5:56

And I think about things like when we had to look up things in the encyclopedia.. Mm-hmm... or actually get in our car and drive to the library and look things up. Right. For me, technology is making us more and more impatient every single day.

Susan Dies: 6:10

I think that's true. You and I are old enough to, have lived in a time when everything wasn't instant gratification. Yes. Where we didn't have the microwave, and we didn't have DoorDash. Yes. And we didn't have Amazon or all these conveniences. I was thinking about how Amazon and a lot of online shopping retailers have caught onto this desire that we have to have everything yesterday. Right. And I was reading that in 2024, Amazon brought in revenues of more than$1.75 billion daily. A day? A day. Because when people want something Amazon delivers. They come to my house all the time because it is so convenient. I don't have to get dressed and ready. Right. To go shopping. I can be in my pajamas. I don't have to have my makeup on. It could be at the end of a busy day. Yeah. Or after my quiet time in the morning. Just a click of a button and credit card and I can get all my shopping done. It comes right to my door. My husband says all the time, you get so many packages. He's not upset. He's just pointing out a fact. But I've told him... I'm really saving money on gas and trips to the store because if I go to the store, I actually spend more. I walk up and down every aisle and I see things that I really don't need.. Yeah... and I'm just throwing things in the basket. But if I'm completely honest, I love Amazon. I love shopping online for all the same reasons that millions of other people love it. It is instant gratification and I get to just check it off my to-do list and have it show up at my door in a day or two. Mm-hmm. It's just this world that we live in..

Keidra Hobley: 7:37

Yeah. Yeah. So we gotta be conscious of that. Right, right.

Susan Dies: 7:42

So I think this is a good question. If patience is a fruit of the spirit, why do we as believers struggle so much with patience?

Keidra Hobley: 7:50

I think we said it already, that we don't like to wait. We don't wanna do that.

Susan Dies: 7:54

Yeah. I think one of the things that comes to my mind though, is that as believers who have the holy Spirit of God living in us, the Bible does make it clear that as long as we live in these bodies, that our flesh in our spirit are always gonna be in conflict. Mm-hmm. Our natural tendency is to want what we want... when we want it. When we want it. Mm-hmm. How we want it. And the spirit wants us to understand that even though this may be what we desire, it's not necessarily what's best for us. Yeah. And just like any physical fruit that takes time to grow and mature... this particular fruit of the spirit, patience, also takes time to mature and to grow. Yeah. And I think a lack of patience sometimes can be a lack of trust in God's sovereignty and in God's timing. Yeah. Right? The frustration that we can feel, the impatience that we can feel, when we think we know what's best. We want God to function on our time schedule... and when he doesn't, that can lead to feelings of disappointment, or frustration, or doubt that he's even listening. Instead of us just realizing that God's timing is perfect and he loves us, and that his delays are actually giving us opportunities to learn how to really trust him. Yeah. And what I love so much is that God is so patient with us, even when we are impatient... and he's willing to stick with us for as long as it takes for us to grow and learn about patience.

Keidra Hobley: 9:14

Yes. And so we're supposed to be like him, right? And can you imagine if God was impatient with us? Hmm. Uh we wouldn't exist.

Susan Dies: 9:22

That's right. I was thinking about definitions of patience. Okay. Because, you know I love, I love words. Yes. And you know I looked it up. Yes. The word patience is the ability to remain calm and to deal with delays in life when things don't go the way we want them to. It's the ability to face difficulties and trials and suffering without getting upset or angry or complaining. And I don't know about you, but I don't know too many people that I would characterize as being a truly patient person.. Mm-hmm... when I look at it in light of that definition. Yeah. But something I think is interesting is that the biblical definition of patience adds another layer to the definition of waiting. The Greek word translated patience is macrothymia. Okay. It's a combination of two words... macros, which means long, and then thymia, which means passion. Uh, suffering. Okay. Or anger. So long passion or long anger. And when I was looking at that, I thought kind of sounds like we get to stay angry longer. Longer, yeah. But it's actually just the opposite. Patience in the Bible is the ability to wait a long time or at least a sufficient amount of time before responding or expressing anger. Mm. In the Bible, patience is always mentioned in the context of interpersonal relationships. Yeah, it is. And it makes perfect sense because if you think about it, we could all be patient if we never had to interact with anyone. Right? That is so true. Right? Amen. Yes. And so this definition is a little bit different from the world's definition of patience because biblical patience typically involves us being patient or learning to be patient with God and with other people. Mm-hmm. Realizing how God is so patient with us. And for us to be more like God as we think about how patient he is with us.

Keidra Hobley: 11:11

I love that. How patient God is with us. Because of his patience with us, it's giving us time to develop a deeper, more intimate relationship with him. Right. And that's why we have such shallow relationships.. Hmm... with each other because we're so impatient. Because it takes time to develop a relationship that's deep, that has depth, that is intimate. Right. You know? And so that's very interesting. I never really thought about it like that before.

Susan Dies: 11:35

You were just talking about patience in light of our relationships and how in our impatience our relationships can be very shallow, but impatience can also cause us to say and do things that we shouldn't really say or do.. Mm-hmm... if we had time to really think about it. And so one of the necessary parts of us growing in patience as Christians is to learn to take time to think about how we're gonna respond when things don't go our way. Mm-hmm. Or when it's not working out the way we think it should. Patience gives us time to think about how we're gonna handle the difficulties, and the trials, that we go through in life. Instead of being reactionary, which is our human tendency, we can learn to be patient and choose instead to respond rather than to react. So good. That is so good. But we have to be willing to acknowledge that we can't have patience on our own. Mm-hmm... because our tendency is to focus more on self.. Yeah... than on others, and to focus on what we want more than on what God wants. We need God's spirit to teach us patience, and to give us the strength to have patience. And so patience is so much more than us just learning how to wait well.

Keidra Hobley: 12:42

Yes. Right. That's so good. Can I just reiterate something you just said? Sure. Because I don't want us to miss this. You said that we cannot be patient on our own. Like if we don't take anything else from this, I think that is key. We cannot be patient on our own. That's why these are fruit of the spirit. All of these character traits that we're talking about over these weeks, we can't do any of them on our own. That's why it's fruit of the Holy Spirit. We have to have the Holy Spirit's help to produce this kind of fruit.

Susan Dies: 13:11

And really, if you think about it, we don't have any resource that is unlimited. Right? Mm-hmm. We don't have unlimited love. We don't have unlimited joy, or peace, or patience, or kindness, or gentleness, or self-control. We need God's spirit. If you think about it, when does our patience tend to run out?

Keidra Hobley: 13:30

When we try to do things in our own strength.

Susan Dies: 13:32

That's a good answer. I didn't think about that one. I was thinking more along the lines of us personally when we are deprived of something. For instance, I heard someone use this acronym H.A.L.T. Okay... HALT stands for hungry, angry, lonely, and tired. That when we're hungry, angry, lonely, or tired, we tend to run low, not just on patience, but all the other fruits of the Spirit as well. And you know, if you're hungry and angry at the same time, that's even worse. Right? I've talked a lot about how precious my little grandbaby Annie is. She is pure joy, 99.9% of the time. But when she is hungry and tired something happens and that little personality changes. And what's happened is she's running on empty. Yeah. And she needs what we all need in those times. Someone who can see past how we're acting and who loves us enough to give us what we need. And that's exactly what God's spirit does for us. For Annie, she needs a mommy who loves her and recognizes that not only does she need something to eat, but she needs a good long nap to get her back on track. And we need that same thing. We need the love of God, through the power of the Holy Spirit, to come alongside us, to refill us, and to refuel us, and refresh us when we're running low in our own strength because as you just mentioned and as we've been talking about, we can't do that on our own. That's right. You know, we need his spirit to do that for us. So what are some practical ways that we can practice patience. What are some ways that we can grow in this particular area of our life? Hmm. That's a great question. What do you have for us? Well, I think the first thing that always comes to mind is pray. Yes. Pray for patience. And it's kind of interesting because people often say, no, no, no, no, no, don't pray for patience because God's not gonna give you patience. Instead, he's gonna give you opportunities to practice patience. Mm-hmm. But I really think that's a wrong way to look at it, considering that God has invited us to pray about anything and he never withholds from us something that we truly need. Yeah. Let alone it be patience, right? Mm-hmm. And so God already knows every situation that is gonna happen in our lives. He knows every circumstance that's gonna require our patience. So when we pray for patience, he doesn't create additional circumstances.. Right... for us to struggle through so that we can learn patience. I believe he's gonna help us. But what it's gonna require is participation and surrender on our part. Yeah. So, when we feel ourselves becoming impatient. Learn to take a breath. Yeah. Learn to just take a minute and choose not to say that first thing that comes to your mind. Choose not to do that first thing that comes to your mind. Now with my reflector, I'm thinking I did throw it outside, but I wrestled with it for two hours. In times when we're going through something that's stressful or something that is causing us to need that patience, we can be intentional.. Yes... about taking a breath and taking a minute and praying and asking God for that help. We need to choose to learn to respond in the power of the Holy Spirit. Yes. And then, for us to grow in patience, we have to acknowledge that impatience, even though it is an acceptable and understandable norm in our culture. Yeah. You know where I'm going with this. Mm-hmm. It's still a sin. That's right. And for us to overcome our natural human tendency to be impatient, we have to rely on the power of the Holy Spirit living in us. But we also have to acknowledge that it is a real struggle. Mm-hmm. It is an area of sin in our life that God wants us to get better at dealing with. Yes. What do you think about that?

Keidra Hobley: 16:57

Well, as you're talking, the thing that keeps rumbling over in my spirit is the fact that we keep saying that these are fruit of the Spirit, and yet I think it's worth saying outright that many of us have a relationship with the Father. We know about, Jesus and we have accepted him as our savior. Mm-hmm. But many of us don't really have a true relationship with the Holy Spirit, and so we're expecting to produce fruit from someone that we don't even have a intimate relationship with.

Susan Dies: 17:24

Yes. We don't recognize that he's even with us 24/7. Yes, exactly. That he was given to us as a gift by the Father.. Yeah... at the request of Jesus. Yes. To help us, to teach us, to lead us, to guide us, to comfort us... all the things that we need. Yes. And this is one of the podcast topics that we.. Mm-hmm. We did... we've talked about in the past, so that we can begin to recognize before we ever began this season two on the fruits of the Spirit, we had to recognize that he is with us. Yes. And he is here for a purpose. Yes. And we can know him just like we know God the Father. Mm-hmm. Just like we know Jesus the Son. The Holy Spirit is knowable and it is an intimate, precious, beautiful relationship that we have to cultivate.

Keidra Hobley: 18:03

That's so beautiful. So if you're jumping into this podcast midway and you're starting out with the Fruit of the Spirit, I'd encourage you to go back and listen to that podcast episode. I believe it was Say Yes to the Holy Spirit? Right. Yeah. And that should be the first one in season two. Very good.

Susan Dies: 18:18

Any other thoughts?

Keidra Hobley: 18:19

No, no. I do have a few scriptures I'd like to share. Okay. Isaiah 40:31."But they who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up with wings like eagles. They shall run and not be weary. They shall walk and not faint." Mm-hmm. And not faint. And that's what I was referring to when I said a lot of times I believe that we're impatient because we try to do things in our own strength. Right. And so when we do things in the strength of the Father, and when we do things the way the Lord wants us to do it, and be led by the Holy Spirit, then we have the strength that we need that will prevent us from being so impatient. Hmm. Does that make sense? It does. Yeah. Yeah. And then how about this one? Matthew 18:23-30. It sounds long, but let's go through it really quickly."Therefore, the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle one was brought to him who owed him 10,000 talents and since he could not pay his master, ordered him to be sold with his wife and children and with all he had and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, have patience with me and I will pay you everything. And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him. But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denari and seizing him he began to choke him, saying, pay what you owe. So this fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him. Have patience with me. Essentially the same exact thing that he pleaded with his master. He said, have patience with me and I will pay you. But the servant refused. And so this one to me is a great example of how we are to be patient with other people because the master is patient with us. But a lot of times we don't reciprocate the same level of patience that the Lord is having with us. And it's like, I believe that's what... I believe the Father's in heaven going, Dude. Like, yeah, you know. You just asked me for the same thing and I gave it to you generously. Mm-hmm. And then now someone else is asking you of that and, and you're penalizing them. And so we have to keep in mind how patient the Lord is with us.. That's right... in order for that same level of patience to flow from us to other people.

Susan Dies: 20:36

I love that. I love that you use that particular story. Can you think of any other stories in the Bible of people that teach us something about patience?

Keidra Hobley: 20:44

Job was patient. Oh yeah. Abraham was patient. There's so many that had to be patient to see the promise of God come to pass.

Susan Dies: 20:51

That's right. You know, I think about Job. Mm-hmm. He was patient in every way. He literally lost everything.. Yeah... and yet He just entrusted himself to God. Yeah, I mean, it's an amazing story in the Bible. He refused to curse God... entrusted himself to God. And the Bible says that in time God restored Job's health and home, his marriage, even gave him 10 more children in addition to the ones he lost. And, of course, because of heaven.. Yeah... he's gonna have those other 10 children when he gets there as well. But God restored his fortune and he blessed him. It says he blessed him more after the trials.. Yes... after he was patient, than before his life fell apart. Mm-hmm. And so I think that's a good lesson for us. You mentioned Abraham. Father Abraham, the, one that God called to be the first one in the line of his people that he had chosen for himself. Not because there was anything special about them, but because this was the line of people God was gonna bring his son through. Yeah. He was 75 years old when God promised to bless him, and told him that all the nations of the world are gonna be blessed because of you. You're gonna have children that are gonna outnumber the grains of sand on the seashore and the stars in the sky and all of that. And yet, 25 years passed before God gave him that son that he promised. Wow. And so that's just another lesson about patience. When God is delaying, it doesn't mean that he's not working or that he's not doing something with a purpose. Yeah. And of course if you read Abraham's story, because of their impatience.. Yeah... they had another child, and even today we're still seeing the struggles between those nations. And then I think about David. Yeah. He was anointed to be king 15 years before he ever became king. Yeah. But I think one of my favorites is the story of the prodigal son. Mm. It's just that picture of the Father looking over the horizon, waiting for his son to come home. It's a picture of God with us. He just patiently waited. He didn't go after him. He let him go out and sow the seeds of unrighteousness that he sowed. Yes. Ran out of money. Found himself in a pigsty, just the worst place that you could wind up. And so he went back home to his Father. Had his apology all ready... and it was at this point... that the Father began to run to him. Mm. Isn't that beautiful? That is beautiful. He patiently waited for him. Yeah. But once he saw him coming, he didn't make him wait.. Mm... even another second. And that's the way God is with us. That makes me think of 2 Peter 3:9."It says the Lord is not slow.. Mm-hmm... in keeping his promise as some understand slowness. So this is talking about the promise that Jesus made that one day he was gonna return for his followers, and take us to be where he is. Instead, it says, He is patient with you. Yes. And with me and everyone who has ever lived, not wanting anyone to perish, but for everyone to come to repentance." So God's patience shows us, how much he loves us. Yes, it does. You know, so these are just beautiful examples, but let's talk about some benefits.. Okay... of patience. Mm-hmm. What do you think some of the greatest benefits of patients, other than the fact that our relationships will be better?

Keidra Hobley: 23:56

Yeah, I think it helps our bodies, our minds, our physical selves be healthier. Because we won't stress as much. We know a lot of sickness and illness and disease is rooted in stress, so I think if we learn to be patient.. Mm-hmm... we will be physically healthier.

Susan Dies: 24:10

Yes. I think it also helps us to make wiser decisions, as we talked about earlier. Mm-hmm. Patience forces us to wait for something to think about it, and many times a delay will keep us from making an impulsive decision that we might later regret. Yeah... a wrong choice that seems right at the moment, and that additional time of waiting is an opportunity for the Holy Spirit to speak to our hearts, and to maybe even change our minds completely, and take us in a whole different direction. Mm-hmm. I think also that waiting changes our perspective. Yeah. It teaches us that the things that we think we can't live without.. Mm-hmm... we really can. Yeah. The Lord is the only thing that we cannot live without. And then just from a spiritual standpoint, patience helps us to mature spiritually. Mm-hmm. Helps us to become more and more like Jesus and to be able to display these fruits of the Spirit in our world, in our spheres of influence, so that people can see that the power and the presence of the Holy Spirit in us truly does make a difference. Yes, it does. Yeah. So good. So good.

Keidra Hobley: 25:15

One last thing that we need to be conscious of is we've spoken a lot about being patient with other people. Mm-hmm. I think for me, it's being patient with myself. Oh, that's good. And so I think we have to also not just take into consideration, you know, how we are in interacting with others, but how do we interact with ourself. Mm-hmm. You know, I'm, I'm most impatient. With myself. Hmm. And so I have to practice the same fruit of the Spirit, when it comes to Keidra as I do with everyone else around me. I'm more of an eight when it comes to other people and circumstances around me, but I'm more of a five or a six when it comes to dealing with myself. So if that's you, I wanna encourage you to also choose to be patient with yourself. And allow yourself to wait for the Lord and the things that you wanna do with and for yourself.

Susan Dies: 26:01

That's a great word to end on. Yeah. We are out of time, but we hope that you've enjoyed this episode, Say Yes to Patience, and that you'll take a moment to stop long enough to scroll down, leave us a text, or find us at one yes@atime.net and leave us a comment or a review and let us know how God spoke to your heart today about this important topic of becoming more patient, and just allowing the Holy Spirit to work more in your heart, in your life, so that you can learn to depend on him for this patience that we need. And so we just appreciate you being with us today. Keidra, would you pray a blessing.. Yes... over our listeners today.. I sure will... as we close.

Keidra Hobley: 26:40

Father, we thank you so much that you are so patient with us. Help us to extend that same level of patience to those around us as well as to ourselves. We thank you that you wait on us to come back home to you as prodigals, dear Lord, and that you don't wait an extra second when you see us approaching. Mm-hmm. Thank you for clothing us with righteousness and putting a ring of authority on our finger and just loving us as if we had never left. We thank you for that, uh, beautiful example of how we are to be with others, and we just praise you in Jesus name. Amen. Amen.